The Turning Point

The second or third year I owned Cherry (can't remember now, it was awhile ago), a friend taught me something that changed our relationship and started us down the path of becoming a real team. Ann had a young gelding, a sweetheart but very pushy on the ground. In an effort to fix this, she found trainer Monty Roberts. She followed his Join-Up method with her young horse and found that it worked wonders for his ground manners. She could get his respect and attention, even though he was still a silly young horse.

When Ann went out of town, she asked me to take care of her horse. She taught me Join-Up so that he would listen to me as well. It was amazing how well it worked. Cherry was laid up from a popped splint bone (the end of our disastrous jumping career), and when she was ready I was determined to try it out on her.

What I did was a very crude approximation of the method, but it worked! We’d been having horrible arguments over who was the leader of the “herd”, and after doing join-up every day for a week, those fights were history. I was the boss, and I was able to tell her so in a way she understood and respected. The darkness was slowly lifting, I was able to gain my horse’s respect. She no longer seemed to hate me as much, and I was warming up to her.

* I’m aware now that Monty Roberts is surrounded by accusations, controversy and scandal, but he taught me something valuable, and no matter who the man really is I will always be grateful for that. *

Our rides improved along with the ground manners. The bit issues were still there, but now she stopped, turned and moved laterally without much fuss. We began working on accepting contact and bending through the body.

We even went on a few campouts. The local Horseman's Association opened its arms to me when I got Cherry, and I’ve been a member ever since. We went to play days and campouts, trail rides and distance riding clinics. Everyone always loved Cherry b/c she was so cute and such a plucky little trail horse. They saw the best side of her, and we were able to put the screaming fights behind us.

I learned many things about Cherry during the first couple years. I learned that she was a food whore and would do anything for a treat. I learned that she was petrified of motorcycles and would leap off the trail n the side of the road to get away from them. I learned that although she was incredibly grumpy and ill-tempered, she didn’t try to get me off. Her bucks were easy to sit, she didn’t rear again, and she didn’t bolt. For a cranky, untrained horse, she was pretty safe.

Doing join-up was the turning point, though. I think the most important lesson I learned out of all that was that to have a successful relationship with my horse, I needed to be clear, consistent and communicate effectively to establish myself as the Boss Mare.